5 Common Thinking Traps (and how to break free of them)
We all experience moments when our thoughts feel like they’re working against us spiraling into worst-case scenarios, harsh self-judgment. With awareness, simple strategies, we can start shift this
We can sometimes find ourselves caught in thinking loops, thinking traps. This can lead to unhelpful thinking, self limiting patterns of behaviour and emotions like anxiety and low mood. With awareness and a few simple tools, we can begin to shift these patterns. Here are five common thinking traps and practical ways to overcome them.
1. Catastrophising
What it is:
Catastrophising (or "awfulising") is when we jump to the worst possible conclusion, even if it's unlikely.
Example:
Situation: You miss the train.
Thoughts: I’ll miss the meeting, my boss will be angry, I’ll lose my job, I won’t be able to pay my bills...
Emotions: Anxiety
Body: Racing heart, hot and sweaty, tight chest, unsettled stomach
Behaviour: Panicked checking of the timetable, avoidance
Why it happens:
When anxious, our ability to think logically and problem-solve weakens. We overestimate the threat and underestimate our ability to cope.
Tips to manage:
Recognise when you’re catastrophising
Take a few slow, conscious breaths
Acknowledge that life includes both difficult and positive moments
Ask: What are my options to manage this?
Try a reality check: What’s the best-case, worst-case, and most likely scenario?
2. All-or-Nothing Thinking
What it is:
Also called black-and-white thinking, this trap involves viewing things in extremes—success/failure, good/bad, happy/sad.
Example:
Situation: You want to exercise for an hour every day.
Thought: I don’t have an hour today, so what’s the point?
Emotions: Frustration, sadness
Body: Lethargy
Behaviour: Give up, turn to distraction or unhealthy habits
Tips to manage:
Notice the extremes in your thinking
Ask yourself: Is this thought helpful?
Explore the “grey areas” of the situation
What’s a middle ground? If not 100%, what does 50% look like?
Use pen and paper: Write the situation and possible realistic outcomes
3. Mind Reading
What it is:
We assume we know what others are thinking—usually something negative—without real evidence.
Example:
Situation: You see someone you know, and they don’t acknowledge you.
Thoughts: They must not like me.
Emotions: Anxiety, worry
Body: Tension, hot, nervous
Behaviour: Avoid eye contact, feel self-conscious
Tips to manage:
Recognise the assumption
Remind yourself: We can't read minds
Ask: What are other possible explanations? (e.g., They didn’t see me)
Stay grounded in facts and evidence
Challenge your own bias: Are you assuming the worst?
4. Shoulds, Musts, Have-To's
What it is:
Rigid inner demands like “I should...” or “I must...” create pressure and emotional strain.
Example:
Situation: A packed day
Thoughts: I have to get everything done today, I must call my friend
Emotions: Stress, anxiety
Body: Tension, racing heart
Behaviour: Over-doing, pushing through → leads to burnout
Tips to manage:
Notice demanding self-talk
Ask: Do I really have to? What are my realistic limits today?
Use problem-solving to prioritise
Try planning with flexibility: If X happens, then Y is an option
Use SMART goals: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, Time-limited
5. Overgeneralising
What it is:
Thinking in absolutes like “always,” “never,” “everything.” It makes setbacks feel permanent.
Example:
Situation: You didn’t get a second interview.
Thoughts: I’ll never get a job. This always happens to me.
Emotions: Low mood, anxiety
Behaviour: Withdraw, stop applying for jobs
Tips to manage:
Spot the extreme language
Ask: How often has this really happened?
Use evidence like a lawyer: Would this hold up in court?
Try writing: What are the costs and benefits of this belief?
Challenge the belief: Does thinking it make it true?
Final Thoughts
Learning to notice and challenge unhelpful thinking is a skill—one that takes patience, practice, and self-kindness. These thinking traps are human and common, but with awareness, you can build more balanced and compassionate thoughts.
Which of these traps shows up most for you? Hit reply or leave a comment—I'd love to hear your experience.